I have been off the grid recently, some of you who have been following events on social media will know that on 23rd March I collapsed in Prague in the Czech Republic, and spent several days in the hospital. The past few weeks have been a scary and unsettling experience. I want to take this opportunity to share what happened ...as best as I can remember it and to give you an update on how I am doing now.
I was in the Czech Republic for the Global Youth Initiative 2017 forum. GYI is an alliance of organizations and leaders from around the globe who are passionate about seeing the next generation reached for Christ. Leaders who are committed to disciple-making and to the disciple-making method and model of Jesus.
These GYI gathering have been so encouraging to me. And on this occasion we were studying the Moravian Mission movement and looking at how Josiah Venture is reaching young people across central and eastern Europe.
Our study of the Moravian movement took us to Moravia in the Czech Republic, to Poland and to Herrnhut in Germany. I relished the opportunity to learn in-depth about this small community of Christian refugees in love with Jesus. A small community from which sprung a missions movement that went to the ends of the earth. The Moravian's sent out more missionaries in 20 years than all the other Protestant groups had done in the previous 200 years. We also learned much about Count Zinzendorf, who had given the Moravians a place to live on his estate. He is a fascinating character and leader who was clearly ahead of his time, Karl Barth called him “perhaps the only genuine Christocentric of the modern age” and George Forell called him “the noble Jesus freak.” I could write at length about this movement and these people ...but that is for another blog post.
Our forum finished in Prague with a study of Jan Hus and the story of Christianity in the Czech Republic right up to the present. On the final day I had gone with a group from GYI to the school my friend Irena teaches in to talk to some students. We had a fantastic morning talking with young people and helping them to practice conversational English. We then spent an hour together praying for Josiah Venture using their 24/7 prayer room. You can find this amazing virtual prayer space here
After this we all headed for the centre of Prague and I had lunch with a group of leaders. Throughout this whole time I felt absolutely fine, more than fine I felt energised, inspired and motivated to begin to take my ministry and my influence to the next level when I got home. We had a great lunch and there was a lot of laughter around that table. I remember thinking how great it is to be with people from across the nations who share the same ministry values and priorities.
Lunch must have wrapped up sometime before 3pm. I had arranged to meet my friend Tomáš for dinner at 6pm, so I had a little time to go get some presents for Val and the girls and to visit John Lennon Wall. This is one of my favourite places in Prague! Since the 1980s this wall has been covered with John Lennon and Beatles inspired graffiti. Back in the 80s it was a source of protest against the communist regime. Even today the wall undergoes changes every day. If I’m in Prague then this place is high on my list of places to visit and photograph.
I walked across Charles bridge and made my way down to the wall and I spent probably 20 minutes or maybe a little longer looking at the wall, talking a few pictures and listening to the busker sing some Beatles songs. It was then that I first realised that I was beginning to get a headache. It did not happen all of a sudden, rather it was a gradual sense of something pressing down on my head. I didn’t think too much about it to be honest and I made my way back to Charles bridge. In the timeline of events I’ve been trying to piece together this had to have been sometime around 3:45 or 4pm.
I was walking back across Charles bridge with my intention to go to Old Town Square, on my way I bumped into Darin from GYI, we stopped and talked for a couple of minutes, I remember telling him that I was meeting my friend Tomsa at 6pm and that I was now going to get some gifts for my girls.
In those brief moments that I was talking to him I was aware the headache was still there, not any worse, not any better and I could feel my body temperature begin to rise. As we parted and began to walk in opposite directions I could feel heat begin to radiate from my face, I walked a little further but I was now aware of a pins and needles sensation beginning in my hands & feet. No shortness of breath or anything like that, but I remember thinking that this is not good... not normal. I remember looking back to see if Darin was within sight or earshot but I couldn't see him as the bridge was crowded with tourists. I could feel myself beginning to panic about what was happening to me, I remember thinking to myself... calm down Paul, you just need to stop take a moment and this will pass. So I moved to the side of bridge, leaning my elbows on the wall. The strange sensation was still there, and I could feel cramps in my stomach too. I vividly remember looking down at the water and praying Lord, help me.
If you look closely at the photo above you will see the lights of an ambulance on Charles Bridge. This was taken at 4:14pm by Bill Hodgson from GYI. He was waiting at a tram stop when he took this shot, little did he know that this ambulance was there for me.
The next thing I remember is opening my eyes... I could see lights in the ceiling and I was lying down... I was in a bed... there were tubes, wires, monitors and beeps. I could hear voices and a person was moving towards me. He asked me in English, "do you know where you are?" I said "I’m in Prague." Then he asked "do you know what happened?" I told him I was walking across Charles Bridge when I began to feel strange. He then told me I was in the Military Hospital in Prague and that I had been brought here by ambulance. I asked him what time it was. He said 7.30, I immediately thought it must be 7.30 in the evening, but then he told me it was 7.30 on Friday morning. There was about 15 hours or so that I was missing.
I know GYI & Tomsa all got quite a fright during those hours I was missing. Only later did I discover an email Tomsa had sent when he was trying to find me: hi Paul are you ok? I’m here in Prague trying to find you.. your phone is on but if I call there its voice machine ...I try to sms you but nothing so I think someone stole your phone. So I was in hostel but you’re not there.. and I was waiting your you at 6pm on Náměstí Míru aslo 7pm and also 8pm... now I’m at home and I’m worried what happen to you...
The nurse had me say the days of the week forwards and backwards, and do some movements with my hands and arms; close my eyes touch my nose etc. That kind of thing. By this stage, I was mainly concerned that no one knew where I was. I asked about my bag and my phone. He said that they had my belongings, though they had to cut my jacket, t-shirt etc off me. (I lost my Hot Water Music shirt... man, I loved that shirt). I asked for my phone, and thankfully it still had some power left in it. I could see people had been calling and texting trying to find out where I was. I handed it back to the nurse and asked him to call Tomsa and Martina from Josiah Venture. At that point I remember starting to shiver, I guess it was the shock of everything beginning to sink in. I must have drifted off again because the next thing I remember is Tomsa and Martina standing by the bed. Martina was able to facetime Val who had by now been made aware of what happened. She was able to see me and that I was okay. They also helped with some forms and documents with the hospital. I was so grateful they were there.
I have to say that throughout my time in the Military Hospital I received exemplary care. I was in the ICU for a few days before being moved to another ward where I was on a monitor for 24 hours. They had done a wide range of tests on me: brain tests, heart tests, blood tests etc. But nothing showed up as a obvious cause for my collapse. I was pretty banged up and sore. I had split my head open when I collapsed so I had a few stitches and my chest was in agony due to fractured ribs as a result of the CPR that was performed on me at the scene.
Through this whole time for the most part I felt remarkably calm, I was aware that hundreds of people all over the world were praying for me. And as I thought about what happened I was also aware of God’s timing and protection too: I didn’t collapse in a dangerous place, or an isolated place (you couldn’t find a more public and people filled place in Prague than Charles Bridge), people were there to help, like those at the scene and then there was Tomsa, Martina, and of course GYI who immediately set about praying for me. My two big requests were healing and home. Furthermore I was in a great hospital in good hands and there was a sense of God’s presence and peace. All I could do was lie in that bed and pray.
